Family Constellations

‘The individual within the greater whole’‘

Today’s blog is the first part of a three-part series, comprising:

• Family Constellations
• Dynamics within systemic work
• Systemic approaches in one-to-one settings

Over the coming weeks, we will be exploring in greater depth: systemic work

The core laws and principles that characterise this approach feature prominently in my (therapeutic) way of observing and viewing the world.
It offers opportunities to recognise or shed light on the dynamics in which clients are stuck. In addition, methods from systemic work can be used to break free from these.

A family constellation is one such method.
This is what we’re focusing on today.

So what exactly is it, where does it come from, and how does it work?

No one exists in isolation
Family constellations, which are now becoming increasingly well-known, are a working method from systemic work. This is an approach that views people within the context of their systems: family, work, teams, culture, relationships, and so on.
The basic premise: no one exists in isolationWe are part of systems that unconsciously influence our behaviour, our choices and our emotions.

A brief history
Family constellations are the best-known form of systemic work and were developed by the German therapist Bert Hellinger in the 1980s and 1990s.

Hellinger combined:

• knowledge from psychotherapy
• family systems theory (including that of Virginia Satir & Ivan Boszormenyi-Nagy)
• phenomenological methods (where you observe what presents itself in the moment, without preconceived theory)
• insights from his time as a missionary and his study of group dynamics

He observed that many people were stuck in problems that did not stem solely from their own lives, but were rooted in unconscious family patterns such as:

• repressed pain or trauma
• injustice or loss in previous generations
• people who have been excluded or forgotten

Key principles
Systemic work is based on a few core laws:

1. Binding - Everyone who belongs to a system has a right to a place.
2. Order - There is a natural hierarchy (for example, parents before children).
3. Balance of give and take - Healthy relationships are characterised by balance.

When these principles are disrupted, inner conflicts, patterns or problems can arise that have repercussions for generations.

What happens in a family constellation?

During a constellation:

1. Someone raises a question or theme.
2. The facilitator asks questions to get closer to the heart of the problem or issue. Questions may relate to elements within the system (such as parents, grandparents, significant events).
3. Once the facilitator has sufficient information, they select: representatives to ‘represent’ these elements. They are free to follow their inner guidance and choose a place in the room.
4. Through their relative positions, movements and feelings, it becomes clear where tensions, blockages or loyalties lie. Each representative has their own role within the system and provides information about what is emerging at that moment.
5. It is important to see and acknowledge what becomes visible. This can bring movement to what is stuck, burdensome or has long been hidden. In this way, it can find a place and the system can re-organise itself.

Constellations can be done live with people or individually using floor markers, figurines or cards.
The actual family members do not need to be present.

My approach
I myself frequently use (family) constellations in a one-to-one setting.
I will discuss this in detail in the third blog in this series.

Before delving into that, next week I will first explore the topic in greater depth with:

‘Dynamics within systemic work’

Using concrete examples, this will help you recognise the kinds of dynamics or (unconscious) patterns that can hold people back, and how this might manifest in daily life.