Beyond Form

The space behind what we perceive

We can observe our thoughts, notice that we are angry, feeling insecure or feeling the need to defend ourselves. There is the thought, but there is also the awareness of that thought. There is the emotion, but also the ability to notice that emotion.

For example, when you receive criticism and feel irritation rising, you might react automatically to it. But when you notice what is happening inside you, without acting on that first impulse straight away, space is created.

Perhaps you’ll discover that the criticism touches on something you’ve long believed about yourself. You don’t have to believe that thought straight away, nor do you have to suppress the feeling. You can observe what’s happening and explore what’s being touched upon.

This doesn’t necessarily change the content of your experience, but it may well change your relationship to it.

What does it actually mean to be able to observe your thoughts and feelings? Are you solely what you think and feel, or is there also something within you that can notice these experiences?

The world of form
In the previous blog, I wrote about the way in which we identify with the forms through which we define ourselves. Our body, beliefs, knowledge and the roles we fulfil all contribute to the image we have of ourselves.

At the same time, these forms are constantly changing. Thoughts come and go, emotions shift, and our life circumstances are always in flux.

Yet we often turn temporary experiences into something that defines us as a person.

‘I have failed’ becomes: ‘I am a failure.’
‘I feel insecure’ becomes: ‘I am insecure.’

We turn what we experience into a story about who we are. When we identify completely with that story, any challenge to that image can feel like a challenge to our very being.

But what happens when you are able to experience these forms without becoming one with them?

Beyond the familiar self-image
Exploring that question requires not only an answer that you can understand intellectually, but above all, experience.

You may understand that your thoughts are not the same as who you are. But when you feel rejected or threatened, that familiar self-image can still take complete hold of you.

The insight may be there as a thought, but it does not yet naturally influence how you experience the situation.

That is why, for me, it is not about developing a new identity, but about exploring what happens when you no longer fully identify with the forms through which you have learnt to define yourself.

Am I the image I have built up of myself, or am I, in essence, the one who can observe this image?

The form and the formless
That question does not need an immediate answer. It invites you to explore for yourself what happens when you step ‘out of your thoughts’ for a moment. It helps you to learn to observe from the position of the observer. In doing so, you do not immediately engage with everything you think and believe about yourself.

The ‘observer’ here is therefore apparently the state of awareness in which experiences arise.

In spiritual traditions, the term ‘the formless’ is sometimes used to describe this. This does not so much refer to a new form that you can discover, but rather to something that does not coincide with the ever-changing content of your experience.

Or, to put it another way: consciousness.Your true ‘self’, beyond form. This can never be fully described in words, given that words are inherently formal in nature.

It can, however, be experienced.

The body as a gateway
A gateway to this presence is the inner body. By directing your attention, for example, to your breathing or the sensations in your abdomen, this presence can gradually deepen.

You may notice that, beyond the stream of thoughts and the stories about who you are, something else becomes perceptible. A deep, silent presence. Vast and, at the same time, intensely alive.

There is nothing here to hold on to, understand or explain.